Sunday, 29 March 2015

"Well, HAL, I can definitely find things wrong with it"

well people, here  is Alex Rieneck, back to quacking on about Apple Macs again, this time for wages even more paltry than those doled out by Auatralian MacWorld (being a columist pays well enough, but not *that* well, when you take the general wonderfulness of the recipient into account. Different to is that in this blog I am my own boss and not bearing the vast weight of an inert management structure on my shoulders in this blog, (which gets its name(AE-35) from a piece of technology in Stanley Kubrick's "2001: A Space Odyssey"I'll be keeping myself to the same strict guidelines I did back then, for the simple reason that good writers like discipline like word counts, correct spellings and grammar, a minimum of off-colour humour and language, sticking to the subject in hand, and perhaps most importantly, having an appreciative readerhip.Now back at macworld the readership were appreciative. Sadly the ones in the wheelhouse should have paid more attention to driving and less to appreciating what they were reading.Still, who would have expected an iceberg in the balmy south Pacific? Especially a cunningly camouflagued concrete one with a missile silo inside with hundreds of minions to protect the fiendish plot that had been explained only the chapter before?
Certainly not James Bond, that's for sure!And sadly, in 2015 not Steve Jobs either; because he got unexpectedly dead just before the last ad-break; one second he was jumping and ducking through a hail of missiles fired by the deadly Mr Cancer- bouncing up off one of the circular-saw blade onesand getting off his own paltry shot. The crowd was with him! Mr Cancer's health bar was creeping down towards the orange!the Samsung creatures seemed to have been vanquished! and suddenly Steves' sprite was replaced by a badly- animated explosion sprite, that shrank to a single white pixel, and went out. The screen was as dark as the interiors of the shocked mouths that hung open around the world. Slowly the screen filled with bright, false colour, swelling music. An advertisement for herbal tea. Was the Show over? The sewage flow meters emotionlesslessly reported the increase of Herbal tea content in the pipes, and the rest of us were left to muck on in the aftermath. this blog is for the last scarred remnants of the post jobsian wasteland, where everyone can tell those big scarey creatures *Aren't * just dressed up water buffaloes and the Samsung Creatures have shiny white teeth and really do eat peoples brains.

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